They said it couldn't be done. They said he would never do it. They said he was "washed", a "bad gamer", a "troll". But here we are, on this 19th day of February 2022, and I have emerged. Not as a boy, but as a man. A man with his comp cape. And a man with his dignity.
I could not do this by myself, though. I didn't have the power. I needed the help of some great people. And when I was at my darkest place, the corporeal beast, they came through. Iso, he sees I need it and he comes running in. Bronze arrows or something, kinda worthless actually, but he was there. Will, heard the gong for help and he arrived- actually stole more kills than he helped with, but there nonetheless. Suckatit, I think he just wanted to kill corp, but uh, he helped. And finally Jake. The Australian. The ambulance guy. The drink too much and hurt his arm guy. He was there. He was fair. And he was there with a prayer. Get boats the comp cape. And he did. He pushed me through those gates.
I completed my kills thinking it was over, the dragon had been slain. But when those kills were done, the message did not ring. There was nothing but wind in the trees, and beasts slain on the ground before me. I check the log for what remains, and my greatest enemy stared right back into my eyes. Dungeoneering. Oh dungeoneering. I had forgotten. He sat there, looming over me like the mountains of lore. I knew there was only one person, one being, that could come from above to help me here. And that man was Gravity. Griv Grav himself. The pker, the wildy owner, the afker, but most importantly- the dungeoneer. So I crawled through the lands of Discordia, scoured the wildy looking for him. The only one who could truly bring me to salvation. And I found him. Stole him away from his mission of ps5, and had him bring me to the promised lands. And he did. He did.
And with his help (and iso was there again but mostly got in the way I think), I did it. I got 120 Dungeoneering.
And with that, there was nothing left but to walk through those pearly gates into the world of being comped.
Thank you for reading, and thank you for being along for this journey.
-Boats